where will i be? what will i be doing? what will i have? 5yr from now?

it upset me to see my dept member posted that statement on facebook. it seems to be suggesting that i haven't been doing my job well enough.

this thought is stressing me out... more than the test coming up this thursday.

perhaps she was right. my goal in life should be in ppl development. but am i really up for it, if i dont even have the answers myself?

son

it's so tough to be a good one.

i am angry and frustrated with what she did, but now i am feeling bad and sad for mishandling the situation.

the tougher part now is probably to learn from it and move on...

parting is such sweet sorrow

i cant be sure if it's as sweet as shakespeare put it. this blog has enough evidences of the bitterness i felt in saying goodbye.

this is not the first time. in fact, i believe i have told myself zillions of times not to, but i always fall into the same trap over and over, of getting emotionally attached so easily. i dont care if the feeling is not reciprocated... i just know that parting a place and its people, who i spent exactly 1 year 2 months and a day with, was definitely not an easy feat for me...

sometimes, i think i'm more like a girl than girl. no offence to any lady reading this... i'm just using it as a metaphor :p

some thoughts

i realise i'm starting to open up to others around me.

rationalising, again: have i found the right frens to talk to? am i really looking for answers? or have i simply given up...?

i promise i'll sort myself out someday... soon. a fren reminded me that writing things down is probably the best way to have a second look into your life. hopefully i'll get enough time when i'm ashore to do that.

anyway, thanks for the wonderful night.

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5 Sep 2006
i rmb i told a fren that night that i was a cynic. i thought hard into it and realise i wasnt quite right to say that. on the contrary i believe in 人之初 性本善. i put a lot of faith in the ppl i know and trust. perhaps, sometimes too much... that's why it hurts.